That is the main problem to this situation. It’s all about CONTROL and that is not going to happen to me, not by a long shot. I have been disobedient from the day one, 1-21-2004. I don’t listen well. I am not going to listen to these POS people in this county. That will never happen not in this lifetime. However that has put me on a long road to hold. When you don’t do what you are ordered to do, then you will have hell on your hands and I have had plenty of hell on my hands. I am surprised that my skin is still there. You know that hell is hot and my hands are scorned. How I am living at this point of time is beyond me. I think that my strong willed and ambitiousness is pulling me through. There are so many days that I look in the mirror and say to myself, another day of life another day of breathing. What is my reason for me to be here on earth? I have everything yanked up underneath me all the time, I have my head held down to the ground and it’s hard to get up when the scum don’t let you breathe and they don’t let you live. But, my blogging is helping me out and it is very therapeutic, I might have to say. Control, that is main objective to this problem, this is 2011, and I am a liberal woman. I will never get in another relationship, never ever again. When I see a man trying to control me, I would just hate to put him in a choke hold. My liberation has bloomed big-time. I think outside the box and I am a realist. The Good O Boy System controls you in every way. If you don’t obey you will have hell to pay. I get so sick of people trying to control me. What I do is my business, it is not theirs. They can live on my sites all day and every day, I don’t give a sh*t. I will still speak my mind and keep it 100. It is getting a little better somewhat, I can leave my house and the calls are not that bad. It is bad when you can’t make a move without someone knowing. I should get a police megaphone and use it every time I leave my property. Tina is leaving the premises. Seriously, this is how I feel; I am like, am I that popular, really? The Control and the stupidity that comes with it, totally blows my mind, for real. The mentality here is very low, like a dozen Barney Fifes. I swear to gawd, it is like the twilight zone! I think they need to take the control and turn it sideways and cram it up their ass that is what I think about this situation. Can I get a hell yeah? I want to do an interview so bad and Dr Phil. I want to talk about this on a face to face level. I want to do that so bad I can just taste it. These people here that I know, they need to see my emotions and my eyes that’s where my pain lies at. I will be able to heal, when I am able to talk about it. I will never heal totally but I will heal somewhat and that is a good thing, better than nothing and being stuck in limbo, you know. I will remain blunt and tell it like it is and never sugarcoat anything, one day I will blow this county out of the water for sure!