May 27, 2013

Ode to the Question

I was asked this question twice needless to say; I avoided it the first time but the second time from another person. I ponder my thoughts and told him directly what I thought about that question. I was asked, ‘Are you afraid of someone coming in your house because it can be easily done, what if they messed with your laptop because I work a lot and I am gone sometimes?’ I was asked this before by woman now a man. This is how I responded to the question; I did not avoid it this time.

First and foremost, I have my laptop locked on my side of it I do. I looked at this person right into the eyes without hesitation. I told him, I know where you are going, it’s about my manuscript. I know there are nosy ass motherfuckers all away around me. Yeah, it’s been in the back of my mind. I went through all kinds emotions while I was writing my first book, I had to withdraw myself. I mean it tore me down to the ground and I had to build myself back up. If someone fucked with my manuscript caused me problems with my publishing’s, you really want to know what I would do. I got closer to his eyes and I could see he was getting scared. This is what I would do.

I looked out the window; I would get in my white car and drive to the Federal Bureau of Investigation the FBI building. That startle him, nope, I am not fucked up about it. I would walk up the steps and I would open that door like I owned that motherfucker. I could see it in his eyes then he knew I was serious. I would ask where I can make some statements. Where is a pen and paper, I will need a lot of paper, you know? Knowing if my manuscript being messed with, I would be pushed to my limit I would snap and I know I could put some motherfuckers under the jail. I have been in a choke hold for so long and if that was done to me so be it. The way I see it, the book is based on a fiction novel, names has been changed. Now when I go the FBI building the real names will come to life. IDGAF anymore! As I write these books I see things so clearly and can’t believe what I have been through and what I have put up with all my fucking life. As I recall, my face has been on the floor in a choke hold in a pile a shit for a looooooong time now. Push my buttons I will cause the domino effect! Then he left without a goodbye, WTF, really. Oh well!

I was watching the news the other day and the FBI of Arkansas wants people to step up and make a stance. I was looking at the news and they are begging for people to step up. It kind of mad me mad at first. I started my crusade September of 2010. I think that I need to get my 4 books published and let me get on Dr Phil and let it play out when it should play out. That would be the wisest choice to do. All of this bullshit that I have to deal with has made me a strong motherfucker.  I had no other choice. My father, well, he can kiss my ass! That’s real talk. I am a good person with a good heart and soul that right there would turn me into a bitch and there would be NO turning back for this OLE girl. I can’t wait to step in front of a camera because I am full and ready to talk about this.